{"id":74159,"date":"2024-04-17T12:00:14","date_gmt":"2024-04-17T05:00:14","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/writehorizon.com\/?p=74159"},"modified":"2024-04-17T12:00:14","modified_gmt":"2024-04-17T05:00:14","slug":"a-man-scores-a-hot-date","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/writehorizon.com\/a-man-scores-a-hot-date\/","title":{"rendered":"A man scores a hot date"},"content":{"rendered":"

Not wanting to disappoint his date in the bedroom,\n

he goes to the doctor to get his tool enlarged.\n

The doctor says, \u201cwe have a new experimental procedure that uses muscle cells from an elephant trunk that should do the trick.\u201d\n

To which the man accepts. Later on, the man and his date are having dinner.\n

The man is in love with her, but is experiencing an increasingly uncomfortable pressure in his trousers.\n

In an attempt to relieve the pain, he slowly undoes his fly.\n

Immediately, his tool lunges out onto the table,\n

grabs a bread roll and vanishes back under the table.\n

His date, unsurprisingly shocked, slowly smiles and says,\n

\u201ccould you do that again?\u201d The man, his eyes watering slightly, replies\n

\u201cprobably, but I don\u2019t think I can fit another roll in my behind.\u201d\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Not wanting to disappoint his date in the bedroom, he goes to the doctor to get his tool enlarged. The doctor says, \u201cwe have a new experimental procedure that uses muscle cells from an elephant trunk that should do the trick.\u201d To which the man accepts. Later on, the man and his date are having\n","protected":false},"author":11,"featured_media":74166,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"none","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[676],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-74159","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-jokes"},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/writehorizon.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/04\/A-man-scores-a-hot-date.png","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/writehorizon.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/74159","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/writehorizon.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/writehorizon.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/writehorizon.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/11"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/writehorizon.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=74159"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/writehorizon.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/74159\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/writehorizon.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/74166"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/writehorizon.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=74159"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/writehorizon.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=74159"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/writehorizon.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=74159"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}