{"id":70628,"date":"2024-03-18T11:55:31","date_gmt":"2024-03-18T04:55:31","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/alternatech.net\/?p=70628"},"modified":"2024-03-20T12:03:32","modified_gmt":"2024-03-20T05:03:32","slug":"man-receives-a-call-from-a-telemarketer-during-dinner","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/writehorizon.com\/man-receives-a-call-from-a-telemarketer-during-dinner\/","title":{"rendered":"Man receives a call from a telemarketer during dinner"},"content":{"rendered":"

One man got fed up with all these annoying calls so he came up with an amazing plan on how to handle the situation.\n

Tom Mabe: \u201cHello?\u201d\n

Telemarketer: \u201cYes, can I speak with Tom Mabe?\u201d\n

Tom Mabe: \u201cWho\u2019s calling?\u201d\n

Telemarketer: \u201cThis is Mike. You have been selected to receive a complete digital satellite system for free. With this you\u2019re going to-\u201d\n

Tom Mabe: \u201cLet me ask you something. Did you know Tom Mabe? Were you a friend of his?\u201d\n

Mike: \u201cNo I\u2019m not. I\u2019m just calling to offer-\u201d\n

Tom Mabe: \u201cHol-hol-hold that thought- hold on a second (to others in the room: Hey guys! Get really good pictures of the body\u2026 and dust everything for prints.) Mike, you there?\u201d\n

Mike: \u201c-Yeah\u2026\u201d\n

Tom Mabe: \u201cYeah, lemme bring you up to speed. You\u2019ve actually called a murder scene\u2026 Mr. Mabe is no longer with us.. I\u2019m Officer Clarke, I\u2019m conducting a homicide investigation. I want to ask you a series of questions\u2026 First to all, what was the nature of the business you had with Tom Mabe?\u201d\n

Mike: \u201cI\u2026I had no business with him. I\u2019m sorry to have bothered”\n

Tom Mabe: “No no no hang on, I\u2019m going to ask you to stay on the phone\u2026 this call has already been traced and we may need to come in for further questioning\u2026\u201d\n

Mike: \u201cYou don\u2019t understand, I\u2019m just calling-\u201d\n

Tom Mabe: \u201cNo, you don\u2019t understand. Unless you want to be charged with Obstruction of Justice, it is imperative that you keep your @$$ on the phone, Mike.\u201d\n

Mike: \u201cHow about you just talk to my supervisor?\u201d\n

Tom Mabe: \u201cNo, we will get to your supervisor in a second. First, gimme your whereabouts\u2026\u201d\n

Mike: \u201cI\u2019m at work.\u201d\n

Tom Mabe: \u201cYou\u2019re at work?\u201d\n

Mike: \u201cYes.\u201d\n

Tom Mabe: \u201cYou bein\u2019 a smart @$$?\u201d\n

Mike: \u201cNo sir-\u201d\n

Tom Mabe: \u201cLemme put it to you this way, Mike. Say I want to mail your @$$ a letter. What would I have to write on the outside of that envelope to ensure that the mailman will deliver it right to your @$$? Geographically speaking, Mike, where is work?\u201d\n

Mike: \u201c40 West (beep), Middleton, Colorado.\u201d\n

Tom Mabe: \u201cHold on, that\u2019s 40\u2026\u201d\n

Mike: \u201cYes sir.\u201d\n

Tom Mabe: \u201cMichael, hold on one sec, alright?\u201d\n

Mike: \u201cYes sir.\u201d\n

Tom Mabe: \u201c(off phone to cops) Get the Middleton Homicide Department on the phone. Yeah, give them this information. Tell them there been a Talk In Connection with a fatal shooting and aggravated robbery.\u201d (on phone) \u201cMike, how did you know Mr. Mabe again?\u201d\n

Mike: \u201cWait, you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re calling the Middleton Police Department?! I\u2019m hundreds of miles away! I don\u2019t even know the guy, I\u2019m in Colorado!\u201d\n

Tom Mabe: \u201cNo, no, it\u2019s not that scary, that\u2019s just a formality. Have you been to his place of residence?\u201d\n

Mike: \u201cNo!\u201d\n

Tom Mabe: \u201cOK, and tell me again what, where were you last night between the hours of 8 and 10?\u201d\n

Mike: \u201cI\u2019m not feeling really comfortable with any of this\u2026\u201d\n

Tom: \u201cHave you even ever spoken to Mr. Mabe, Mike?\u201d\n

Mike: \u201cNo, I don\u2019t even know the guy- that\u2019s what I\u2019ve been trying to tell you!\u201d\n

Tom Mabe: \u201cOk, great, just calm down, hold on, look, just back up\u2026 I\u2019ve got just one more question fer you, Mike\u2026 as you well know, I\u2019m sure, Mr. Mabe was a flaming homosexual. And there is no easy way of asking this\u2026 I don\u2019t wanna embarress you or nothin\u2019\u2026 but\u2026 were you his gay lover?”\n

Mike: “What?! No! What the hell kind of question is that?!”\n

Tom Mabe: “Look look, if gay is your way, that\u2019s Ok. I still know there are a lotta you gay people in that closet. Not sayin\u2019 I haven\u2019t thought \u2019bout it myself\u2026 you know? Go out to Las Vegas, or somethin\u2019. Buy a couple o\u2019 drinks\u2026 cut lil\u2019 Mexican midget\u2026\u201d\n

Mike: \u201cThis is ridiculous! (hangs up.)\u201d\n

Tom Mabe: \u201cHello?\u201d\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

We bet you hate it when you are in a middle of something and then out of nowhere the phone rings and there is a telemarketer on the other side trying to sell you a bunch of things you don\u2019t even need. This can be frustrating at times because these people are usually quite pushy\n","protected":false},"author":11,"featured_media":70629,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"We bet you hate it when you are in a middle of something and then out of nowhere the phone rings and there is a telemarketer...","_seopress_robots_index":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[676],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-70628","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-jokes"},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/writehorizon.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/Man-receives-a-call-from-a-telemarketer-during-dinner.png","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/writehorizon.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/70628","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/writehorizon.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/writehorizon.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/writehorizon.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/11"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/writehorizon.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=70628"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/writehorizon.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/70628\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/writehorizon.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/70629"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/writehorizon.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=70628"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/writehorizon.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=70628"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/writehorizon.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=70628"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}